Here’s another of our guest posts – this one from a guy who is self-described nerd.
When I was a small boy, cute and pretty girls surrounded me but once I became a teenager that ended. In high school, when all young people could have gone to dates and proms and had a boyfriend or girlfriend, I was constantly buried with my books and scientific experiments in the lab. During my University years, I was a regular visitor of the library as I thoroughly did research for projects and tons of paper works. As soon as I graduated, I was in a dash to find a job and when I found one I was what they call a non-stop working machine. Put simply, I’m your typical nerdy type of guy who had no knowledge in dating somebody and never had a girlfriend his whole thirty-something years.
So agonizing that most of my friends are engaged to be married, now have children and has got a wife and kids of their own I was appalled. The pressure and anxiety brought on by the long absence of not having a partner in my life took a toll on me. Accordingly, I went along with this advice of some friends to go on blind dates. But I’d gotten several turn downs hence just as I was getting frustrated and about to give up on dating , a friend and colleague suggested why don’t I try online dating.
Here are some problems I experienced before I got successful in online dating.
1. Lack of experience in dating. Yes, having no practice and skill in dating can make you feel more nervous once you try it. Nevertheless, enjoy and have fun while you are on a date . The competence you gain every time in meeting girls for dates will help you meet a potential match and make a girl feel special once you have found someone that caught your interest, since now you’ll know what women want and how to make them feel special.
2. Underestimating yourself. Most women honestly like men who are bold. Brave men get a plus point with girls. A man who is sure of himself and daring enough to approach a pretty woman turns on girls. When you confidently introduce yourself to a woman you like online, this tells the woman you are a man with self-esteem. Who would desire someone who doesn’t have the guts and attitude, anyway? You’re a chicken when you’re afraid of taking chances with girls.
3. Arrogance. Both in regular and online dating, as soon as a woman see that you talk more about your status, job, how much you earn or in other words you are merely talking about yourself; it’s a clear indication that you’re money-oriented and downright selfish. Women usually like men who instantly show interest with them through an engaging and reciprocal conversation – not an oratorical speech about your achievements/past accomplishments.
4. Being too choosy. To have the most lovely woman beside us is like having won a trophy which other men envy to have. But be realistic. If your ideal woman is a tall, blond, and whistle-bait figure who likes sports, the wildlife, and is successful in her career, would you care to know an auburn-headed girl whose interest is involving herself in non-government organizations, a painter and a self-declared bohemian? Get past that limiting stereotyping attitude. Widen your sphere, don’t hurry and be patient in waiting and searching, for Love will come to you unexpectedly.
5. Focusing on the outer shell. It’s too easy to be deceived when you only look at a woman’s profile picture. Today, photos are simply edited digitally. Inner beauty and a delightful personality lasts but superficial good looks can fade.
6. Aggressive Behavior. Don’t push yourself too hard with a woman if you don’t want to look like a disrespectful fool. When an appealing woman doesn’t react to your advances it only means she’s not interested. You will only appear rude and a desperate creep.
My inexperience then in traditional dating, lack of confidence, egotism, and being fussy, superficial and creepy has proved to be an edge in my online dating escapade as I have become a positive and sensible seeker for a potential life-partner. Yet, as years went by I have gotten a lot of information, tips, and advices on conventional dating and online dating from my personal experience.
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